Three Words I Never Want My Child To Hear Me Say | Anchors Aweigh

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Three Words I Never Want My Child To Hear Me Say

Knowing there is a baby growing in my belly is the most joyful thought in the world. I wonder who he or she will be, what their little personality will be like, what they will look like... I really just can't wait to meet this child. Knowing I am going to be caring for this little one is the most humbling thought, but also one of the most intimidating. They will look up to me, rely on my to teach them right from wrong, watch my every move and learn from what I say and do. Hello, pressure.

I was trying clothes on the other day and looked into the mirror and said, "Ugh, I look so fat". Obviously I am pregnant, but I don't have much of a bump yet and instead am rocking the bloated look. That's not the first time I've looked into the mirror and said "I look fat". Not even close. I am a thin person and have never been "fat" a day in my life. I know that, but there are still those days where I, along with a lot of girls I think, look in the mirror and decide I look fat today. 

I remember getting ready in my mom's bathroom when I was in high school one day and telling her I thought I looked fat in my outfit. She said something she probably doesn't even remember saying, but it stuck with me all these years. She said, "Chelsea, how do you think it makes people who are bigger than you feel when you say that?". I had never thought of it that way. I'm not fat nor do I have any type of eating disorder (I eat more than most girls, and my family/friends could attest to that), but I still look in the mirror and have vanity issues just like the next person. I'm confident in my body and the way I look, but I'm just like any girl- I can find the imperfections. 

I don't know if this baby is a boy or a girl or what they are going to look like, but I am going to love them and think they are absolutely perfect no matter what. I'll always see them as perfect, but the rest of the world won't. Society will remind them they don't look like the supermodel in the magazine. Society will tell them they're too fat, too skinny, too short, too tall. I can't shield them from the harshness of the world, but I can equip them with the self-confidence to realize both their outer and inner beauty. I can make sure they know just how fearfully and wonderfully made they really are. I can make sure they know they are perfect.

When this child starts watching my every move and mimicking what I say, I want to be a positive influence. I want them to look in the mirror and see beauty, so I need to do the same. If this child looks anything like me, they are going to be naturally tall and thin. They won't ever have to struggle with weight issues if they lead a healthy lifestyle. I may not look like a supermodel, but I was created in His image to be beautiful. I want my child to know and see the same in themselves.

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13 comments :

Kate Mitchell said...

Such a good point! I never want my future children to hear me say that.

Sam @ reddyorknot.blogspot.com said...

Great post!! I've thought about this a lot too and what type of role model I want to be for our future children! Kids are sponges and watch your every word/action so they pick up on even the tiniest of things!

Ladonna said...

It is a very good point. We really do need to be careful in what we say. And our actions speak the loudest so even if you don't say, "I look fat." Your actions can say it loudly. Thanks for this reminder.

Amy said...

most definitely hit home with me.
i am finally on the journey to be healthy (PRAISE!) but have been overweight now for at least 15 years...and it is HARD to change my thinking and personal mindset.
but i'm with you, i don't want to pass down any negativity
.
Great post!

Janelle Vannice said...

I love this! I have read studies about girls developing self esteem issues because their moms constantly complain about how THEY (the moms themselves) look - so it makes the girls wonder if they should be worried too... so I think it's a really good thing to prioritize NOT feeling bad about your body in front of little ones!

Bailey Kay said...

I love this post!

Lindley @ The Grinning Labrador said...

Chelsea, I have been out of the blogging realm for almost a year now but wanted to congratulate you on your pregnancy!!! I too am pregnant, due in a matter of weeks! I am so happy for you and your husband and will very much enjoy following your baby news :)!!!

Carly Blogs Here said...

Such a cute picture at the end! I can relate to this (just not the being pregnant part, haha)

Susannah said...

This is such a wonderful post to ponder and digest - especially being pregnant! Thanks so much for linking it up with the Faith and Fellowship Blog Hop!

Terri Lynn Grothe said...

great point, very important.
I came over to say hi from Leslie's confessional friday , newest follower :)

Kristy {Seven Graces} said...

What a beautiful revelation. Kids bring out the greatest in you, you just watch. :) Glad to have found your blog through the linkup. P.S. I have a New Mama Series in case you're interested, covering pregnancy to toddlerhood. Blessings to you!

Stephanie said...

Great post. If more parents had this outlook about being role models from the get go, I think we would have much fewer issues of vanity pressure. We need to teach our children about positive self respect and that of others as well.

Hana R said...

So we don't use the word "fat" in our house because of our 5 year old. But it's crazy that at just 5, she has learned from preschool and school about that word. She once asked me if her belly was fat. I was shocked. All I can do though is constantly pray for her, and constantly remind her that she's beautiful because she was made in His image. I also constantly am promoting a healthy lifestyle by example so she understands what it means to be healthy! Y'all are going to be great parents!!!

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